Category: About Writing

Life: Over-extended!

‘Over-extended’ sums up my state of being pretty accurately when I realized I was hardly doing anything I really enjoyed, but started to feel harried! This time last week I had two blogs and a Substack to populate with interesting posts. I’d signed up to receive a dozen newsletters to read through the week. And that all is not counting my presence on FB.

And lol, I was expecting to be able to continue gardening, mending, painting, and Lego construction. And keep up with real-life socializing, medical appointments and dream journaling. I even thought I could write three long stories at the same time! Tch tch tch. Truly over-extended. But don’t worry, this blog is a stayer. Lodestar is a stayer. MELD, second part of the Monster-Moored series, is being prepped for a structural edit. Earth Fall, a prequel of the Monster-Moored series, that I started to serialize on Substack, is stalled.

Because I’ve been pruning. The Substack account? Is gone. Three quarters of the newsletters? Unsubscribed. Half a dozen FB groups? Unfollowed.

Last Sunday I decided to learn a new Lego technique at least every week. Not necessarily anything to do with Lego storying projects, which will continue once the stream of visitors I’ve been having dries up. Visitors mean that my Lego-ing table, aka the dining table, must be empty for dining on.

Some of my visitors were here a couple of weeks ago for the ‘Three Sisters’ weekend I hosted at my place when I had both my sisters to stay. We try to do this every year though we live all over the country.

Some of my visitors are here for the cataract operations I’m booked in for, when I need an in-house carer to stay for the night after the op. Two eyes equals two cataract operations needing two in-house carers a month apart, first one of my sisters, then my son. It’ll be a relief to get my eyes working together again. At the moment, I’m doing all my reading with the now-good eye and a magnifying glass as my old specs don’t work anymore.

The new Lego-technique in that small bunch of Lego flowers up above, concerns the stamens in the orange California poppy. Four tiny stamens, each made with two of the elements that I had no ideas on how to use. I have another dozen of these mysteries in my collection.

But going back to that feeling of being over-extended, and not being able to do anything well. Feeling harried by the amount of reading. Feeling my creativity nose-diving. I’ve hardly done any painting lately. An installment for Lodestar was taking months to write instead of a couple of weeks. I haven’t knitted at all this winter. And sitting down with a good novel ? Fell by the wayside.

So here’s to trimming, pruning, and cutting back! Organizing life to be able to live and enjoy it!

How and what have you trimmed recently? Apart from your finger and toenails. 🙂

Lodestar: Ahni & Srese, 34

Long time readers will remember that chapter numbers are continuous and that the character names signal a change of scene. Events in this chapter happen in what Kes and his people know as Rockeater’s Ridge. Srese and Sard live here, and Ahni and her people sought shelter here from Kes’s people. In this crucial chapter, Ahni’s implant takes over the habitat.

34.-what-the-implant-didDownload

Recovering from Grief

Thinking about grief, and what helped me recover, I was surprised to discover I’ve used the strategy-following four times in the last 25 years.

When I was 50, after two years of floundering with ME/CFS and grieving over the loss of my previous life, I still needed a lot of down-time. I decided I needed an activity I’d never done before to get into a place where I didn’t have to worry about the disease and everything that went with it. Where I could spend a bit of time creating, relaxing, being a normal person. I gave myself an hour, whether I produced anything or not. A lot of time was thinking about it.

Obviously, an activity I’d never done before needed time learning how to do it and lots of it. That was part of the charm. I had a lot of time. I decided I would learn how to write flash fiction, little stories of about 500 words. I’d read plenty but never written other than letters at that point. Learning is by doing. So every morning I would spend an hour writing or thinking up what I would write. On the backs of envelopes and other scrap paper at first. Eventually I got my son a word-processor and used that too. Writing gave me a reason for not feeling bad about having to spend so much time alone. It helped pass the time. As I grew stronger I began to spend more time on it and one thing led to another.

Then my mother died. I recall coming home after the funeral, aware of a huge empty space in my mind where she’d been. I had been thinking I wanted to learn how to paint with watercolors, but no time, sick mother. The next day I bought a cheap set of little tubes, five colors, with two brushes and a plastic daisy-shaped paint mixing thing that I still use six years later.

I painted on all kinds of paper at first, the back of weetbix cartons and the backs of calendars. A few free online youtube lessons and away we go. I posted many of my efforts here and on my FB page. Had a great time in between all the sad thoughts and might’ve beens.

Fast forward to 2020. I was diagnosed with lymphoma, had 5 months of chemo, moved to Brisbane, weak as a kitten, and fumble-fingered in the extreme due to neuropathy, a side effect of my chemo. After a couple of months of recovery I cast around for a way to retrain my fine-motor coordination. I tried knitting but could only hold the knitting pins for a few rows. Flat puzzles didn’t do it for me. Pieces hard to pick up. I got my son’s 30 year old Lego out. Made all his models, learning to follow the instruction booklets. Started to make my own ideas. Decided I needed more Lego … started to feel better. I’m building a tabletop town.

January 2023, with three huge stresses all coming together, I fell apart. I didn’t at first know what was happening. Lots of fatigue. More allergies reared their heads. Fluttering heart. Hot feet. Eventually recalled my ME/CFS symptoms. Learned all the modern names for them. POTS. PEM. To name but two. I was obviously in a flare-up.

At that time I had already been posting little slideshows of my Lego stories to my FB page, for my friends. So when I felt slightly better, I decided to start a blog with Lego stories. That needed a lot of thinking through first. Now already it’s hard to limit myself to one hour a day. There’s the building. Ordering spare parts which means poring over various online secondhand Lego catalogues. Writing stories for the characters to act out. Taking photos of the scenes. Editing photos. Blog posts etc etc.

This is it in case you’re interested. https://reetsbricktown.wordpress.com

Some days I hardly think about my crappy indoor life. Before I know it, it is time to go for a little walk. Then make my dinner. Watch TV one hour. Paint dreams for one hour …this last is my third thing that is helping me recover. Another time for that one. Bed.